What was I thinking?

So I went to the Student Advocate Association meeting for significant others the first week we moved here. I wanted to be outgoing about meeting people and making friends. The SAA club consists of several interest groups and clubs you can sign up for and participate in. In an effort to meet many people I signed up for several clubs...including the intramural club "volleyball." I assumed I would be on a big team and playing for fun against other wives that aren't so great at volleyball.

A couple weeks later I got an email saying what team I was on (there are only 8 on my team)...that means I will have ample playing time. Oh dear. And it gets worse, our little team will be playing against all of the school's intramural teams - including teams of all men that have really played volleyball and are probably pretty serious about it.

I'm losing sleep over this because I am bad! Really bad. The last time I played volleyball was in 9th grade and I was on the "D" team. I have these crazy double jointed elbows, and I blink when the ball comes close to me and just swing wildly. What was I thinking?!!! The first game is this Thursday (I will be totally relieved if they ask me in a kind way not to come back).

I love sports, I love to watch sports and I love to play. Unfortunately, I'm just not the most athletic. I was good at clogging at that was about it.

I played tennis in 9th grade. My partner was LauriAnn. We were "beginners." We just couldn't manage to hit the ball into the right box when we served. However, one day we hit the same car windshield 3 times in a row (it happened to be the only car with a mom sitting in it...she quickly moved her car). Before one of the matches I asked my coach, Mr. Shaw (who was also my math teacher) to please put us in a match against someone at our own level. Without even cracking a smile he said, "hmmm...I don't think there is anyone without arms or legs in the school district this year playing tennis."

In 9th grade I also went out for cross country. The girls on the team approached me one day because they needed one more girl to make a full team. I thought it sounded fun so I went to practice that afternoon. I realized I didn't like to run. Luckily, one of the guys on the team lived pretty close to the school so when the team went on really long runs, we could stop at his house, eat a popsicle, and then run back to the school about the same time the rest of the kids were getting back from their run. There was one girl I could beat at every race, sometimes two. My mom thought it was painful to watch me, my brother commented I ran like a deer that had been shot once in the leg. At the end of the season the team voted for awards. I was touched when the boy with severe physical disabilities won the boys award for "most inspirational." I was then shocked when the coach read my name for the girls award for "most inspirational." Apparently my physical abilities in running were similar to his. I still have the plaque.

I won't go into detail about my confusion with zone defense in basketball, or my time passing out at the starting line before running the 800 in track. But suffice it to say, athletics have never been my time to shine. My one shining moment was in powder puff football when according to my dad, "I knocked the big girl on her butt."

I feel sick to my stomach. What was I thinking?